7 Things to avoid during courtship period for a happy marriage
Published on November 21, 2019
Courtship period is one of the best phases between wedding confirmation and the wedding day. It allows you to get to know each other but also a good time for families to get together and understand each other’s expectations and preferences. Interestingly, this period is the most sensitive phase as both the parties need to be careful of what they are going to say.
Here are a 7 things you need to avoid during courtship period for a happy marriage.
Giving space to each other
We know there is a need to spend time together and understand each other better but there is a fine line between spending time together and giving personal space. Do not suffocate the other person or let anyone smother you as well.
Do not become possessive cutting them off from the rest of the world. Understand and respect one’s privacy, their needs and wait till they open up on their own.
Building high expectations is a no-no
Do not build high expectations and hopes in the beginning as it can result in uncalled disappointments and differences in future. Don’t make unreasonable promises which you may not be able to fulfill later.
Be honest about yourself and all the aspects of your life. This helps in building a strong foundation in your relationship. Do not involve in fake commitments to make your partner happy with the relationship for the time being as it can get troublesome after marriage.
Leave your past behind
It is a fantastic idea to be honest and clear about the past from each other but make sure not to bring the past in the present in such a way that it becomes uncomfortable for each other. Don’t be judgmental about the other person’s past and make hasty decisions. You might lose getting to know a great person. Be understanding and sensitive of this period and be a strong support to each other without any apprehensions.
Be unconditional in your relationship
Courtship period is one of the beautiful stages and putting forth unwanted conditions will ruin the relationship. A relationship that is made on rules and conditions is unhealthy that will ultimately take a toll on your marriage. Give your partner much liberty and space to live a life of their own. Do guide and support as and when required. Offer your suggestions without being dominant or aggressive. Assure your partner that you will support them. Have a free relationship with your partner so that you can make good decisions with healthy discussions.
Don’t plan the future already
Leave the “future talks” for future itself. Pre-planning your future is red flag that you need to be wary of. Increasing your stress is the last thing you and your partner need right now especially since you are already going crazy with the wedding arrangements. Unless and until the situation demands, steer clear of such conversations that blow a gasket for both of you. Talking about wedding flowers, honeymoon destinations, kids’ names etc. is sure to suffocate your partner and drive them away from you. You can read our article on how to handle pre-wedding jitters to stay stress-free.
The beginning of this beautiful relationship is always exciting and you must be very talkative with your partner. With smartphones available, exchanging romantic messages every day sure sounds exciting as it helps you enjoy the closeness to its fullest. But keep in mind that messages can never truly pour your feelings and there is a good chance your partner might misconstrue the words. Hence, it is better to avoid or limit this non-verbal communication as much as possible. The SMSes not only seems unreal but are unsuitable to express your real emotions. It’s not like we don’t understand the value of texting but then hour-long chats are a strict no.
Do not pretend. Reflect what you are with your prospective life-partner. Ensure that your partner knows the good and the bad sides of your personality and let them accept for what you are. It’s not surprising when we try hard to please the partner in every possible way especially in the beginning stage. At times, we morph a little and go that extra mile to make him/her happy which is understandable. But if it transforms into lies and white truths, it will only spoil things for the future.
At times, it feels risky to show the real you but the partner who accepts you wholeheartedly knowing the best and the worst is undoubtedly the one. Hence, do not hide things from each other. Make sure to discuss each other’s likes, dislikes and craft your relationship in such a beautiful way that your partner feels open and comfortable in discussing and confiding crucial things with you easily.
Finally, it’s your relationship and nobody can love or understand your partner better than you. Treasure these moments of togetherness and build lovely memories. We hope that you have an enjoyable courtship period. Every special bond takes its own time to develop and yours will too blossom into a happily-ever-after.